Tea With Gossip

Got a SMS from someone asking for tea at one of the restaurant nearby before evening program starts. When I read the SMS, I thought so nice of her asked me out for tea. I called her telling I cannot make it there so fast maybe postpone to some other days.

While chatting on the phone, found that she wanted to ask me on a room why it was like broken in. Of course we chat on other things too. I told her I have no idea why the room is like that, she replied, Oh you don't know, who know ahhhh. I told her I have to hang up cos I need to go.....

Aiyah, want to have tea with me because want to dig information from me. I told myself, next time this person invite me for tea, water or coffee, not going.

Small thing only mah, why so irritated. At night before going to sleep I wanted to charge my handphone. I noticed a SMS from this lady I had missed. I open the SMS, it said so you had been listening to Asha Katha, nevermind about the tea. I was like what the meaning..........

I have to be carefull what I say or said. But this lady is funny anything to do with this KK she must know........ But when wrong accusation is throw at KK, she will not tell the person off even she know it is not the right accusation..... Haiyah sen! meet this type of people. Tired!

Big Lawyer have 1 sen common sense or none at all

Yesterday only I found out why temple big lawyer was not talking to me. When I found out I was very irritated and asked whether she had brain or not or rather simple common sense.

The reason for not talking to me, was that I deleted her husband, sister-in-law's husband and brother-in-law email-id from the email list which my god-sister use to forward temple programs or news on Maharaj arrival. My god-sister email-id and password which is not shared only she had the password. How am I going to delete all these email-id from the list? Never cross my mind I does magic or able to hack into my god-sister email list. Doesn't she see that all the email send had been and still is send by our god-sister (I wonder she regards us as god-sister), and BCC to everyone.

Why go and assume, why don't the lawyer just asked why her family member is not recieving any email from my god-sister. Just politely asked, people will compare whether there had been a change of email-id or their in-box had been so full and never bother to clear. Sender just delete the email away, since they don't have the time to read why send.

After a few hours, in the evening thinking over it. Me not a graduate have better common sense than a graduate and a big lawyer. I wonder how she fight or present her case in court. I pity the client that have her as their lawyer. Is she thinking others have no brain only she has, they believed what she said. Look like it's proof that "Lawyers are liars".

I thought we are all god-brothers and sister, having the same guru, we don't have to play games, like in the outside world. Look like not....having spend more than 6 years in the temple with them, I find that I can get better friends outside the temple compare to them. At least they are more genuine.

Well, last year 2009, after my 5 months assignment in Bangkok, more than half a year I did not show up in the temple. I noticed this big lawyer was avoiding me, I give her a Haribol the respond was Oh you ahhhhh! I was like when did I step on their tail, I asked my god-sister, what happened she also don't know as she was also not talking to her. Away for so many months also can step on her tail. Must have a long tail that stretch from KL to BKK.

I wonder why all these senior disciples like this one leh! Angin! Angin one lah. Mix with them too much can siao......

Asked us junior or new comers to respect them, how to respect....aiyoh someone tell me how to respect.....

Now I goes to temple only when Maharaj comes..... otherwise stay clear of that place.

Crazy! Gila! Siao lang! I want to go to sleep now.

Looks Like I Worry too

This had been sitting in my laptop for quite sometime, was telling myself post or don't post. I had decided to post.

Meaning to write this for quite sometime but don’t know where to start. I am still scratching my head or rather searching my heart how to put it out. At the same time I do not want to sound like an old grandmother.

I think I look, yes! I think I look like I don’t care or want to know what happened around me. Like very cool. What the Chinese saying 天 跌 下 来 当 皮 盖 (tian die xia lai dang pi gai), meaning, “the sky fall take it as cover”. Don’t know whether I am right on this, my nephews, nieces and siblings might not think so. They might see me as K Poh as I sometime K Poh into their life or opinion.

Everyone goes thru the process of teenage or growing up, even I. During this time it is very important we take the right step, mix with the right people. If we do walk the wrong direction, we must realized and turn back.

My nieces who read this, I know I know you all are big boys and girls. You need your own space and privacy too. I want to say curiosity kills the cat. It is good to be curious but must always be careful. Even myself at this age I am still curious but always put my careful antenna on. Don’t play with fire, know your limit. Trust your instinct and be street smart.

I know each generation view and think differently, because of environment and media. When I was young, I see things differently from my parents too. Had lots of argument, but always they win. At that time I see them as bully, now that I am a senior citizen I understands that it is their worries that make them react that way. Some parents let you see their worries some keep it inside let you see the cool side of it.

As children we think we are mature, but when we’re faced with a situation we will know how mature we are.

I do worry but I know all the talking will show like nagging or scolding. I want to protect them but how much can I protect them, I am not God. If I am God I make sure they are protected by a special force field where no harm can come to them. I am not God so I can only pray for them. My prayers “Krsna (God) please guide them, keep them safe, show them the way to the right path. Let them know what is right and wrong. Keep people with bad intentions away from them and keep bad intention away from their head too.”

I am very glad that my 2 nephews pass their form 3 exam with good grades, especially Fat Fat. He now realized that studying is good for him and a ticket to better future. I had pulled his ears a few times when he could not care less on his studies. I hope he realized why I pulled his ears.

Ahh! I do sound like a grandmother, telling grandmother story is difficult when at the same time you want to look cool.

Later maybe later later If I feel like blogging on the parties that was throw in this very house those days, those old days.

Loss Out Because Don’t Read and Write Chinese 华语

Due to globalization, international firms that venture out of their countries, goes to China (中国) are looking for employee that know Chinese and English. So those that don’t know Chinese will loose out here.

I am bilingual, but the wrong combination, Bahasa Malaysia(马来语) and English(英语). If I choose to stay out of Chinese market then it is okay. If I want to go into Chinese market here I will loose out.

There are big giant companies looking for employees to fill the vacant positions in their project or company. So those who are bilingual the right combination will get the interview first, so wrong combination will always be second choice or no chance at all.

I loose out here as I did not get my interview straight away. My interview is about 2 month time when the interviewer comes home for his/her home trip. I was given this interview is because I showed her the confident in me.

There will be those who know Chinese but had not used it for a long time. They read but when it comes to writing or presenting it will be also a tedious task. Here the person might not want to take up the challenge.

With China emerging as an economic giant, being really good in English(英语) and Chinese(华语) is very useful. It opens up another opportunity. To tap this opportunity I must know English and Chinese. That is why I am giving myself 2 years to really pick this language up. I am getting myself a private tutor. Hopefully after 3 months I am able to raise my standard of Chinese from standard two to six. I should not give up so easily. Like I always tell my nephew when you play a computer game and not able to win the first time, tell yourself 我可以的(I can do it), give it a second try. I am telling myself the same thing我不会放弃。我可以的。(I will not give up. I can do it。)

Growing Up

Today had lunch with my friends. We chatted on a few topics. One of the topics was growing up.

There is this boy or man, person, left the comfort of home for greener pasture. When he first arrived, he would cook, clean for himself. After a few days, he started to miss home and ……. Sisters and mother always attend to his needs and wants. There is more but will not write.

This person also tells me to take care of him. His words make me jump, I told him off. I have to work and family too. You chose to leave home. You learn to take care of yourself. I walked away, I know if I had stayed my mouth would have more words coming out. While walking away in my mind Grow up boy.

We gossiped on this person.

Now that I am at home, Growing Up came into my mind. When you said had grow up, the person can look grow up but had his mind matured. I noticed many people, including myself too always said we are grown up. I looked back when did I really grow-up?

I grow-up in my late twenties and early thirties. Why so late, it is during this time, I saw building my career and planning my retirement fund is something I had to do so that I can be comfortable later. I went to Singapore spend a few days with my brother. He asked are you going to be a clerk thru out your working life. You are very good in programming why don’t you go start a career on it. He saw there was not much of a reaction from me. He said parents cannot take care of you for your whole life. First thing back in Kuala Lumpur you go get yourself register for night classes.

That’s what I did. I registered for a diploma course. I was very broke for a year, I make sure I scored distinction. I needed it to start this career as I was competing with younger graduates and starting late too. During this time it was the first recession I saw, my dad’s business had a slow down. Things were bad, for the first time I saw money was very important. My dad always said no worries I will always be there for you including financially. I saw nobody can be there for you only you yourself.

When I got my result, luck was at my side, within a few months I found myself a job as junior programmer in a bank. It was a tough 4 years for me. I had to travel to town and work do not finished at 6pm. As I wanted to walk the extra miles, I putted in more time in the office. All these extra time, I did not have time to attend my higher diploma so never had my degree. During that time, I always complained should not have listened to my brother. After 15 years, I looked back, I had to thank my brother. If not for him I would be an account clerk, and cannot afford the life style I have today.

Dad was very angry with me for spending lot of time in the office, he asked me to sleep in the office. He saw I was having a hard time and could not help. I wanted to learn the skill up quickly, I did not care what the bank paid me. After 4 years I joined the contract line. I was glad I put in the extra miles, I did not have a hard time. When my dad saw the hard work was paying off, he told me I should have let you out earlier. It is okay dad I still make it.

During my 10 years as an account clerk, it was 9 to 6. My mom would send and pick me up. I only spend on lunch. Sometime I go back for lunch. I hardly spend, was such a good girl. My needs and wants was not much, I was satisfied with what I had. I get small gifts from dad every now and then. Life was very comfortable and good, until recession hit.

Besides this there were other problems too that I had to face. Work was always not a problem but human was the problem. It is the human problems that really make me grow up open my eyes to the real world. I also saw why my dad tried to keep me by his side, he wanted to protect me.

Dad, I will continue to grow so that you can be proud of me

What Do They Get From It?

What do a person get from putting a person down, or put a person in a bad situation? Is it to show I am much better than you, it makes me happy to be able to do that to another person or my life had been and still perfect.

From young until now, I always asked myself what does one gets from putting a person down, is it they get so much kick out of it. Don’t they have any conscious, if they don’t have, the person they are putting down has. Are they so perfect themselves?

Going thru all the youtubes on Aska Yang(杨宗纬), this question probe up in my head again as I will normally avoid people like this. They make me sick in the stomach. But Aska Yang(杨宗纬) could not do it. He had to hang in there, until today there is one youtube I refused to watch. I only watch a bit of it, I tell myself I have enough of it. To me the host and judges are equally sick. They are not one bit any better looking than Aska Yang(杨宗纬) himself. They think they are. To me Aska Yang(杨宗纬) is much better looking then them.

I saw the youtube on him before the competition and early part of the competition. He is not that bad looking just that he has more manly features. My nephew also have features like him, we never find him ugly and my nephew has lot of girls chasing after him. I see Aska Yang(杨宗纬) spend too much time under the sun, he was very tan. It is the hair style and his dressing what I called jinjang. It is that jinjangness and too much of sun that makes him look bad, not his looks.

Those reporters trying to make junk news out of him, to me they are junk themselves. Calling him caveman, it is better to look like a caveman, with a mind and heart that had evolved to a civilize man. The reporter mind and heart had not, still at caveman level, he only has the look of a civilize man that is why he/she can call another person caveman. Is it making news that put a person down is so important or it gives them a kick out of it.

Sometimes I am glad that my Hanyu reading is not that good, when I see it is a junk news, I just admire the photos. But if it is news on a person achievement I will translate the article using a software translator.

Look at Tom Jones, he does not have the look of Tom Cruise and still don't have but when he sings he is ......... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zGs5Js7FVHo

I guess in the age of Kali Yuga, don't expect too much.

Why I start to BLOG?

I used to read others' blog. I find some of the blog very good. I asked myself why do people blog, the answer I had was to share their view and feelings or to keep it as a diary. Maybe it is a good way to spend time too.

After the Malaysia GE12(12th general election), I read everything that's is in Malaysia Today, Tony Pua, Jeff Ooi and DAP blog. Especially Malaysia Today, I found that there are many others that share the same sentiment as me. Before that I have read Malaysia Today a few times, but I always feel that it was trying to paint a bad picture of the government. As I read only the main stream paper. When the GE12 result was announced, I asked myself, "What is going on?" I started reading all the above blog. I really respect the guts RPK has, I can really kou tou to him.

Why I decided to blog? I asked why am I so afraid to let others know what I think, why locked it in my head and heart. I noticed blogging is also a good way of expressing ourself, letting out what is locked in my heart, it improved my command of english too.

I hope those that stumble into my blog will not feel offended by some of my views and feelings. I always believed everyone has the right to their own view and feeling. Each of us are unique in our own way but we must also repect others.

I find it is a good way to spend my time while waiting for assignment, at least it keep me occupy